Coping with despair
Knowing you’re not there
Ashamed to just admit
I’ve been a fool
So I blame it on the Sun
Run away from everyone
Hoping to escape this ridicule
SO EARLIER I CALLED ONE OF MY GOOD FRIENDS OUT THE BLUE (WHICH ISNT SOMETHING I USUALLY DO, EVERYBODY SO BUSY THESE DAYS, I DONT LIKE BOTHERING PEOPLE) AND TOLD HIM THAT HE BETTER WATCH HIMSELF. HE ASKED ME WHAT I MEANT, AND I TOLD HIM THAT SOMETHING CAME OVER AND TOLD ME TO TELL YOU , THAT YOU BETTER WATCH YOURSELF. I DON’T KNOW WHY IM SAYING IT, AND I DONT KNOW WHAT KIND OF SHIT YOU MAY BE GETTING INTO IN CHICAGO BUT YOU BETTER JUST WATCH YOURSELF. HE GAVE ME A NERVOUS LITTLE LAUGH, QUICKLY TRIED TO CHAGE THE SUBJECT AND THEN GOT OFF THE PHONE. I HOPE HE’S OK, I DIDNT WANNA SCARE HIM BUT I HAVE A FEELING IM GONNA BE BURYING A FRIEND SOON, I HOPE WHATEVER IS GOING ON HE KEEPS HIMSELF ALIVE. HE KEPT GRILLING ME ASKING ME WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT LIKE I KNEW SOMETHING I WASN’T SUPPOSED TO KNOW. AND I SIMPLY TOLD HIM IF IT MEANS SOMETHING TO YOU TAKE IT TO HEART, IF THIS IS COMING OUT THE BLUE MAYBE IM JUST CRAZY. WHY THE FUCK AM I STILL UP TELLING THIS ON A PUBLIC FORUM? OH WELP
IF IM GONNA BE SLEEP DEPRIVED I MIGHT AS WELL LISTEN AND WATCH SOME GOOD SHIT. BOY HOW I WISH I COULD GO TO SLEEP JUST FOR A LITTLE BIT :(
